Indian Parents, here’s how you can raise your children to be anti-racists
Racism is not born, it’s taught. As a society, it is no secret that we have a long-standing preference for light skin. We embrace people with light skin with more ease than people with dark skin. In addition to bragging-rights, light-skinned people are given numerous privileges while those with dark skin are discriminated against. We as a society are constantly breeding racist attitudes. How, you ask? Let’s look at these common scenarios. How do you react when relatives at family gatherings casually comment about how light or dark you have become recently? How many skin-lightening products do you use? What kinds of bollywood songs are you listening to? How many times have you teased someone and called them “kala or kallu”? How many times have you heard someone compare a person with darker skin to a maid? These are anti-black statements that are part of our everyday life. Our kids are constantly watching who we are, to understand who they should become. When we criticize, compliment or even comment on someone’s skin color, our children are listening and learning to discriminate based on skin color. Is this what we want to teach our children? If it is not colorism that we are promoting, what is it?
It’s not just our actions but also our silence that kids are learning from. Everytime someone talks about our skin color like it’s any of their business, let’s not dismiss it with silence. Instead, let’s actively stop them. By doing this we will cause a disruption in the status quo of the person engaging in these negative statements and may force him/her to confront the need for change. Importantly, our children will learn the appropriate response for this form of overt colorism.
The next time we watch TV with our children and see an ad for skin-lightening, let’s talk to our children about how terrible it is that people are treated differently based on the color of their skin. Let’s teach our children that this is unacceptable. The next time you make your first visit to a newborn baby, do not comment on the skin color of the baby. When we do this, we are labelling that baby and teaching our children that proximity to whiteness makes people superior to dark skinned people. The next time you listen to a Bollywood song that promotes colorism, stop it. No matter how catchy that tune, do not listen to it. Again, have a conversation with your kid about why that song is sending a wrong message to our society about skin color. Do not allow people to get excused at any cost when they promote racism/colorism in any form. A lot of people get away with racism by saying they are joking. Other actions that we can take to raise anti-racists children include making sure our kids are watching shows and reading books that are diverse and inclusive.
We could dramatically improve racial attitudes of children when we have explicit conversations with them. So, it’s not too late. Even if you have in the past participated in some form of structural racism unknowingly or knowingly, as we all have, now is the time to stop. Let us all do the work to become anti-racists, support activists and organizations working to dismantle structural racism, educate ourselves and members of our community and most importantly, shape our childrens behaviors and attitudes to be anti-racist.
